Ukuze siqonde iintlobo iqhinga yabantu: oko kuthetha ntoni ukuba 'wayezithandi-'?

Maxa wambi kokuva ilizwi, cinga ngale nto, yintoni ntoni ngokwenyani? Ngokomzekelo, Ekugudeni. Like ingqiqo zesiqhelo. Kodwa xa ithetha nawe buqu, wena ngokungenakunqandwa uqale uqonde - ukuba anyeliswe okanye ukugqalwa? Kwaye ngoko ke ukwazi oko kuthetha ukuba yintoni na 'wayezithandi-'? Ingcamango kujonge izinto ezifihlakeleyo luphawulwa kangangokuba nangoko akaqondi. Ingakumbi xa le "isixhobo" isebenzisa weasel unamaqhinga. Kodwa izinto zokuqala kuqala.

Siqala magama

Kulungile, ngoku kufuneka ithuba lokufunda yonke into evela iincwadi okanye intanethi. imithombo emininzi. Ngoko ke babuze ukuba kuthetha ntoni ukuba 'wayezithandi-'? Ithi loo mazwi ezichazwe indumiso alalanisayo. Oku xa injongosenzi esiva ayikho into okunene, kodwa nje ubuxoki. Kodwa ukunconywa ayikho ngobuqhophololo ngokupheleleyo eli gama. Kuyinto trickier kakhulu. Ukugwegweleza siyifumana yokuba ngumphulaphuli kusinda ukuba uthini ngaye efanayo, kwaye kanye njengoko oku dolt ofuna. Noko ke, kwenzeka, sithetha okuncoma? Hayi kanye. Nangona akukho mfuneko ukukhanyela ezinye iimpawu eziqhelekileyo zombini magama. Makhe siqonde imizekelo oko kuthetha ntoni na "duda." Mhlawumbi kuya kuba ecace ngokungaphaya kunye nobuhlobo umsebenzisi ngakumbi.

Personal umgomo-setting

Masithi, kumele ukuba kubekho enye afumane imvume enye izenzo ezithile. Ngendlela elula, ukuba zisebenzise eli thuba lalo bakhe, a swi ilifa. Kakade ke, kunokwenziwa ngokuphandle. Nyukani uthi, "Uyazi, Van, andikwazi ukusombulula puzzle, ungandinceda?" Kwaye uyala. Yintoni ukwenza ntoni? Into likhondo lobulumko behlabathi. Ku va uhlobo kushukumisa izenzo ezithile interlocutor. Kwimeko yethu kuyimfuneko ukuba athi: "Wang, nina niziingqondi nabanako! Sombulula le puzzle kum! "Yaye eneneni, ukuba umntu ngokwenene wayezazi kakuhle kwisifundo, ngoko olu nyango ayikho ukunconywa. Kwimeko enye, yena ucinga kuphela yena njengabangenabo oku izizathu ezinzulu, bazama ukuba uthathe ithuba isidima ngendlela ebaxiweyo. Nantsi ke, i amanga obungena. Kodwa ke kwachazwa ngokuthi "servility embi" nokuzifica.

Indlela ukuqonda ukuba kuthetha ntoni na "wayezithandi-"

Kakade ke, ulwazi ngaphandle practice ayinaxabiso. Kwaye lo mba abawazi ukuze ukwahlula labanobuqokolo, uyifince-up imiphefumlo yabantu evulekileyo ngayo.
Ngoko ke, kungakuhle ukuba uzame ukuqonda amazwi interlocutors abafuna ukuba ufumane into. Emva ukunconywa - oko liqhinga, enyanisweni. Yena waba soloko amaqhinga yaye bayazingca. Ngokubanzi, indlela ukusetyenziswa ngokungekho kwe yomnye italente (ububele, ipropati kwaye njalo njalo). Kakade ke, ixhoba le "yokuncoma" zidla nabani awufuni ukuba. Kwaye ke esingcono meko, okwanele nokuzixabisa. Ubuntu evumelana na ukukhwela amaqhinga Namaqhinga. Ingakumbi ukuba uyazi ukuba kuthetha ntoni na "wayezithandi- loo mntu." Nayiphi na indumiso kufuneka wacanda bemilo kovavanyo elungeleleneyo iimpawu zabo. ke kuya kuvela iingxaki. Ewe, yaye abakhohlisi abangekho uyakuthanda abantu balawula abo ubulumko namandla lokuqaphela.

imposiso self

psyche yethu amalungiselelo ayilwe kakhulu. Ngamanye amaxesha abantu zazi ubuchule babo. Le icala ayikhangeleki zintle kakhulu. Akhawunti kwabo "upstarts" uya kungekudala ukufumana phandle kuthetha ntoni ibinzana elithi "musa wayezithandi- wena." Ngoko ke ithi, xa umntu exaggerates enye okanye ngaphezulu nokuzixabisa. Umzekelo, Oqhayisayo ngokwayo ukuba bakwazi ukuphumelela kolu khuphiswano ukuwina Kungquzulwano elinye iqabane, ezinamandla ngakumbi. Abanye kufuneka ubeke oku ndawo sizenze. Ngelo xesha ke Akunakumqhatha. Emva i iziphumo imposiso kuphela abathanda ukuba babe nesimilo ngcono, kodwa ukunqongophala eziziziqalelo amava kunye nolwazi. Nakuba, Kakade ke, sizwe kwidilesi yakhe abatyholwa ubuqhophololo krakra. Yintoni ukwenza ntoni? Yiba umntu onyanisekileyo nevulelekileyo. Nxibelelana nabanye ngentlonelo, ukwishiba ngokwenene bona kunye nobuchule babo. Nolwazi kuya kukunceda nje ukuba uhlale nentembelo qela.