Usapho bachaze kunye nefuthe lazo abantwana

Ngaba uziva ukhululekile kusapho lwakho? Indlu - njengenqaba, le ndawo nalapho kukhuselekile, ukhululekile, apho kukho ukuqonda, uthando nemvisiswano. Kodwa ke, ngelishwa, asizizo zonke iintsapho bathi njalo.

Ngamanye amaxesha entsatsheni kukho iingxaki kubudlelwane, ngoyaba iintswelo neemvakalelo linye, kulawulwa yi unxibelelwano yedwa. iiseli Loo maKristu abizwa ngokuba uluntu kakuhle. Okuninzi elide yenzululwazi kunye ngaphantsi ekhubekisayo - "usapho kakuhle." Eli nqaku lichaza iimpawu zabo, iimpawu, iintlobo kunye nefuthe namanye amalungu.

bekuya kuba buhlungu njani na, kodwa mhlawumbi kuya kuba ngawe okanye usapho lwakho? Akuyomfuneko ukuba kwakhona indlela yabo iindlela zokunxibelelana? Ngapha koko, bakha ungubani abantwana, apho kamva abe "nzima".

Yintoni kubizwa ngokuba intsapho obuhesheheshe?

Le ngcamango losapho kukuba iveza ukuba ukuchazwa ngale ndlela ilandelayo. It microsocium, ezisetyenziswa yaye kukhuthazwe ulawulo nobundlobongela kunye nokuziphatha etshabalalisayo, musa ukutshintsha kwexesha. Kwaye oku kuyinyani hayi kuphela umntu omnye, kodwa ke onke amalungu entsapho. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, akukho intlonelo, imilinganiselo, yesazisi, ukuthathelwa ingqalelo merit, kungenzeka ukuba bathethe ngokuphandle malunga iinkanuko zawo. Naziphi na iingxaki ngokuqhelekileyo ngazo, kwaye bayathandabuza ukuzimela kwabanye abantu.

Ngenxa yoko, intsapho kukuba iveza abakwazi ukuhlangabezana neemfuno zabo buqu kunye ngokomoya, nokuzeyisa actualization, uphuhliso, nomthwalo ufumane bazive bephantsi kunye nezinye iingxaki zengqondo.

Le yunithi yoluntu akanako ukwenza ngokufanelekileyo imisebenzi yalo (ikhaya, izinto, nokuzala, ezemfundo, iimvakalelo, ukulawula, umthendeleko ngokomoya, kunye nabanye).

Izinto imfundo yasekhaya obuhesheheshe

Njengoko usazi, usapho kukuba iveza musa kuvela bebodwa. Oku lula zizinto ezininzi.

• Socio-economic. Esi simo izinto ephantsi, ingeniso rhoqo, kakuhle ihlawulwe kwaye lingako imisebenzi, iimeko zokuphila kakuhle.

• Ulwaphulo-mthetho. Drug mkhuba, butywala, indlela yokuphila yokuziphatha, irekhodi itsheki kulwaphulo-mthetho, imilo basekhaya, ngokubonakala inkohlakalo kunye ukuphathwa kakubi amalungu entsapho.

• Socio-lwabantu. Le usapho engaphelelanga, kunye nabantwana abaninzi, kunye abantwana kudityaniswa yaye eyamkelweyo, etshata kunye abazali abakhulileyo.

• Isifo nentlalo. Enye okanye amalungu osapho abanobunzima ukuphazamiseka engapheliyo, ukukhubazeka kunye nezinye izifo (ukusuka ukudandatheka unomhlaza). Lo mba ke ibandakanya iimeko engentle yokusingqongileyo, umsebenzi eziyingozi, nokungahoywa ucoceko kunye nemigangatho yococeko. Ezi mpawu yeentsapho ezingasebenzi kakuhle badla ezinxulumene ne zinto zilandelayo.

• LweNtlalo kunye nasengqondweni. Le usapho imfundo abangafundanga, kunye neenqobo likhubazeke, ulwalamano otshabalalisayo obuhlabanayo ngayo amaqabane, abantwana kunye nabazali. Kudla kukho iintlobo enye okanye ngaphezulu lobundlobongela (emzimbeni, ngokweemvakalelo, ukungahoywa, ngokwesondo). Enyanisweni, lo mba ukuze babe neengxaki ezininzi zengqondo. Ngokomzekelo, abanye buhlungu unlived, nto leyo ethintela ukuthwala iindima nokubalelwa kunye zokugcina abantwana.

Kakade ke, oku akuthethi ukuba usapho kunye nabantwana abaninzi okanye kunye nemivuzo ephantsi ibithethwa ngaphambili. Nakuba kule meko nokuba singameyisa bothando indlu kunye nomoya ivumelane. Zonke izinto kufuneka ziqwalaselwe ngezindlela ezahlukeneyo. Kodwa ke kubalulekile ukuqwalasela ukuba kumndilili zikunikeza isiphumo nokuqinisa kuphela.

Iimpawu kwiintsapho ezikwimeko

Ngokuqhelekileyo bume ezihlelelekileyo ukwazi ukuhlangabezana ulwalamano entsonkothileyo bumuncu. Ngokomzekelo, umtshato okanye abazali eziphikisanayo, uyise nokuba ngunina, akazibandakanyi bekhulisa abantwana, ubutshaba ezinganyangekiyo phakathi kwezihlobo. ukuxabana Constant, cwaka iveki emva kwabo, kwaye maxa wambi nkqu nokulwa - kwisehlo eqhelekileyo kwintsapho etshabalalisayo.

Kwezi kumaqela amancinane, ingakumbi abantu, badla abanengxaki iziyobisi okanye utywala. Women sivame iingxaki zempilo zengqondo, abathi bona zizifo ezingapheliyo kwaye zimpi. Kakade ke, ukuba ngethuba loviwo asiyonyani, kuba ezi ngxaki nje "ahlale intloko yam." Kodwa ityala izigulo zabo abafazi shift amanye amalungu entsapho (kuquka abantwana), liqhekeza ukuqondisa ukuziphatha kunye nokukhokela kwakhe kwicala elifanelekileyo.

iintsapho ezingasebenzi kakuhle luphawulwa imijikelo. Yeyona sizathu kakuhle. Yonke imithetho kunye neendlela zokuziphatha ukusuka usapho olunye ukuya kwenye kwizizukulwana ngezizukulwana. Oko osacinga njengelifa nje yookhokho babo. Kungenxa intsapho yakhe kwizizukulwana kwenzeka okanye yintlekele.

Ngokomzekelo, unina care kakhulu yaye iphenjelelwa unyana wakhe. Akukho nto isimanga yokuba bakhule indoda ixhomekeke ongenayo uluvo. Okanye omnye umzekelo. Ukuba uyise wayo utywala, intombi ka phantse ikhulu ekhulwini linokuba uya ishade ndoda. Kwaye akusayi kubakho ngozi, ukukhethwa eyenzekayo kumgangatho ienjini. Kakade ke, oku ukube ixesha ukuqonda ingxaki.

Yiyiphi na uphawu lentsapho obuhesheheshe

Cinga ngoko, kukho iimpawu entsapho kukuba iveza apho umntu abahlelekileyo kubagweba.

• Ukuphika yeengxaki ezikhoyo kunye nolondolozo wento engekhoyo.
• Ungquzulwano kubudlelwane. Hlakalo ziphindwa rhoqo, kodwa ke ingxaki azixoxwa okanye ukusonjululwa.
• ulawulo Absolyutizirovanost namandla.
• Ezichaseneyo iimvakalelo, iimvakalelo nezimvo.
• Ukungabikho umahluko ye zabo "I". Ukuba notata ungatyhilekanga, kuya kuba njalo maxa onke.
• Akukho unxibelelwano vala. Akukho wenza ngqo ukuxoxa iingxaki zobuqu.
• Le ukuvalwa ibinzana iimvakalelo, ingakumbi ezingakhiyo (umsindo, ingqumbo, inzondo). Ngokufuthi kumayelana abantwana.
• Inkqubo engqongqo imithetho kunye neemfuno.
• Usapho enqabile okanye soze bachithe ixesha kunye.
• ukusetyenziswa kakhulu utywala okanye iziyobisi.
• Codependency. Loo imeko sizalwa intsapho yabantu, nto leyo likhoboka lotywala okanye leziyobisi. Oku ni ntshikilelo enkulukazi kuwo onke amalungu entsapho. Bona ngenkani ukwakha ubomi babo ngokungqinelana yintoni, nini nokuba kangakanani ukuyisebenzisa wabasondeza. Kungenxa yoko le nto usapho ngentla codependency ukuba kuhlangene omnye komnye.
• Ubukho yimfihlelo ekwabelwana, akukho namnye unokuyixela. Kumalunga ukufihla elidlulileyo mthetho, iikhemikhali uxhomekeko kunye nezinye iimpazamo nosapho.
• Ukuba kude. Akavumelekile ukuya kutyelela uthabathe kubo ekhaya. Kaninzi i nitrogen kakhulu kwi ukunxibelelana nabanye.

Iindima kwintsapho disharmonious

Ngokusekelwe kwezi mpawu, sinokugqiba ukuba kukho microsocium ethile indima etshabalalisayo. Ngaphezu koko, ukuba zithintelwe ngokungqongqo ukuba itshintshwe. Loo malinge nangoko nipped neengcambu.

Ngoko ke, yintoni iindima kukho kwintsapho obuhesheheshe? Ngokuqhelekileyo abazali benza njengoko ngabacinezeli kwabantwana, eziva ngokwenene amandla nolawulo. Nabo, zibuye zibe wayewaxinile. Nangona rhoqo kukho iimeko xa indoda ofihla umfazi wakhe okanye ngolunye uhlobo.

Vatswari va ngokwabo kweenkosi umntwana ngokwabo abone okulungileyo okanye okubi kwaye kufuneka senze njani. Abantu abadala abakholelwa ukuba akhona ngobuhlobo ngokweemvakalelo kwi intsapho yonwabe. Xa abantwana, ukuthobela uxatyiswa ngaphezu kwabo bonke, ngenxa yokuba kufuneka ukuba babe "bonwabe". Intando ithathwa ngobungqola, ekufuneka yaphulwe ngoko nangoko. Kungenjalo, abazali ziya kuphulukana ulawulo phezu meko, yaye umntwana kukha uphume ingcinezelo yabo.

Wena ke asikwazi ukuvakalisa izimvo zabo kwaye cela kutheni kuyimfuneko ukuthobela bonke abantu abadala. Oku kukwaphula imithetho intsapho etshabalalisayo, nokuhlaselwa ngamandla kunye ubungcwele abazali. Ukuze bazive bekhuselekile kwaye ngandlela ithile asinde, abantwana bakholelwa ukuba abantu abadala okulungileyo, kwelase zonke iimfuno zazo. Kuphela xa ekhula umntwana iqala ukuba bagxeke abazali sixhathise imithetho ezinzima. Kungelo xesha iqala 'umdla kakhulu. "

Ikwabonakala yintsapho kukuba iveza uthando igunya nogonyamelo. Ngaphezu koko, kunokuba umzimba, iimvakalelo, ngokwesondo kunye ezivakaliswa neemfuno ezingahlangabezwanga (ukuba abazali kohlwaywa yindlala, kwanyanzeleka ukuba ahambe iingubo nasemiqhokrweni yeengxondorha, njalo njalo). Ukuba umntwana kakubi, ndafumana uphawu embi esikolweni okanye baphula - balandela ngokukhatywa, Babesinqinda okanye enye isohlwayo esiqatha.

abantwana abahluphekileyo ukuze ubomi ngokwasemphefumlweni. Amaxesha amaninzi Kungenxa yoku ukuba iphuhlise umnqweno amaxhoba. Le umnqweno zingqondweni ukudlala indima ixhoba, ukukulungela ukuba abe likhoboka. Umzekelo, ugodnitsa-ungumfazi wawuphi engqushiweyo, ukuba bahlale ndawonye umtshato ezinxilisayo ukuba wesifazane amandla, njalo-njalo.

Rule ezintathu "hayi"

kwiintsapho ezikwimeko bahlala imithetho yayo ngenkohlakalo, kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo ubilisa phantsi iimfuno ezintathu.

1. Musa uzive. Awunako ekuhleni ukuvakalisa iimvakalelo zabo, ingakumbi negative. Ukuba into akayithandi - cwaka. Kwakhona kwiintsapho ezikwimeko uyibone ukuwolana, okanye bephuzana.

2. Musa ukuthetha. Akwenzeki ukuba kuxoxwe ngemiba kunye nezifundo ndlela aluvumelekanga. Avamise kakhulu ukuvalwa incoko malunga iimfuno zesini. Akukho wenza ngqo ukuba baveze iingcamango zabo, izicelo kunye neminqweno. Isebenzisa ukuchaza nokwenza. Umzekelo, umfazi ufuna umyeni wakhe ukuba ndizihlambe izitya. Kodwa akazange acele ngalo ngqo, yaye ngokufuthi uya zibonisa kuphela baze baveze ukunganeliseki. Okanye kwelinye icala. Umama wam wathi kumolokazana wakhe: "Xelela umzalwana wenu, kangangokuba wenza inkunkuma." Abantu intsapho etshabalalisayo nto ebusweni, andazi ukuba ukucela njani uncedo. Ngoko ke, benza oko kwi bypass kunye nokusetyenziswa yabameli.

3. Musa ukukholosa. Hayi kuphela usapho kukuba iveza andazi ukusombulula iingxabano zabo, ngenxa yokuba izikhohlakali zingamoyiki uxoxe ngawo kunye nabanye, yaye musa ukufuna uncedo. amaqela Ngoko amancinci babeqhele ukuya abahlala ngaphandle entlalweni. Ngoko ke, yonke imizamo ichithwa ukulondoloza umfanekiso lobuxoki intsapho engumzekelo.

Nantsi imizekelo imithetho eqhelekileyo.

• Awunako ukuba wonwabe. Iintsapho disharmonious babekholelwa ukuba ukuze wonwabe, banandiphe ubomi, dlala, akhululeke, - kubi, kwaye nesono.

• "Yenza le nto uyixelelwayo wena, yaye, njengam." Abantwana khuphela ukuziphatha abadala. Kodwa abazali basoloko engxolisa nokohlwaya umntwana kuba eziphatha njengabo. Abantu abathandi ukuba uqaphele iziphene zayo, kodwa abantwana nilindele akunakwenzeka. Nanku umzekelo. Umama uchazela unyana wakhe ngobo busuku ukuba cwaka uze uzame ukwenza ingxolo, ngoko abamelwane babe aphumle kunye nokulala. Nekhaya ithi enxilile daddy ngoko, iqala ukuba uwuchithachithele ifanitshala umkhwazo apho phezulu. Wazi njani umntwana wakho ukuba ungakwazi ukwenza ingxolo ngokuhlwa?

• Ukukholelwa enethemba zobuxoki. Lo mkhwa lubonakala baphuphayo ngokugqithiseleyo, kwaye kwenzeka onke amalungu entsapho. "Siza kulinde, qiniseka ukuba kuza kwenzeka into, yaye sonke siya kuba kakuhle."

Iintlobo umkhaya etshabalalisayo

Iindlela kwiintsapho ezikwimeko ingabonwa kwisikhundla sokuba (ukuthotywa) eluntwini micro.

usapho Inharmonious. Ebonakala ukungalingani kanye, ukukhula kunye nezithintelo akhethe xa umntu esebenza kwenye.

usapho Destruktogennaya. Ngokuba lo hlobo iingxabano semvelo, ukuzimela ngokugqithiseleyo, ukuzimela, attachments ezingabuyekezekiyo ngokweemvakalelo, akukho sokusebenzisana kunye nentsebenziswano.

Yodonga usapho. Kuye yongquzulwano eziphakamileyo kakhulu, nto leyo ekugqibeleni zifikelela kwiinkalo ezininzi zobomi. amalungu entsapho ayeke ukwenza imisebenzi kunye nemisebenzi yabo, kodwa abanjelwe kunye nendawo yokuhlala eqhelekileyo. Umtshato amaqabane, kuloo mgaqo, yaphela, kodwa ukuza kuthi ga ngoku akukho nto ubhaliso ngokusemthethweni.

ekhaya Broken. Umyeni nomfazi kuthwalelwa phandle umtshato, kodwa kulo mzekelo, ukuze kunyanzeleka ukuba enze imisebenzi ethile. Kuyinto umbuzo inkxaso material amaqabane zangaphambili, umntwana okuqhelekileyo ngumzali. Amaxesha amaninzi kukho unxibelelwano mkhaya uyaqhubeka sikhatshwe iingxabano ezinzulu.

Kule ntlobo yeentsapho ezingasebenzi kakuhle ayikwazi kuqwalaselwa uhlobo olunye, kuya kuqwalaselwa ngokwahlukeneyo.

Psevdogarmonichnaya ekhaya

Xa uqala, intsapho onjalo akukho kwahluka bonwabile. Kubonakala ukuba ukunyamekela umntwana, iyakwazi ulondolozo kunye nemisebenzi yemihla ngemihla kubonakala inkqubo lusekiwe. Kuyinto eqhelekileyo ubomi. Noko ke, ukuba ngoyaba umbono yokuqala, kwicala elingaphandle kodonga uyakwazi ukubona kakuhle-ntle neengxaki ezinzulu.

Ngokuqhelekileyo, umntu ubeka imithetho ongenalawulo lwentando yesininzi kunye nemimiselo, kuba waphula umthetho elandelayo izohlwayo engqongqo kunye ngqwabalala. Le ndlela yolawulo singabandakanyi inxaxheba amanye amalungu entsapho ekwenziweni kwezigqibo. Ngoko ke, musa ukubuza izinto ongathanda ukuba. Kumakhaya kungekho attachment nothando ulwalamano iimvakalelo kufana inkqubo wagabadela. usapho yokusetyenziswa kakuhle, nangona efanayo ngembonakalo, kodwa ngaphakathi ungabona zonke iingxaki.

Isimanga, kodwa loo microsocium inokuphila elide ngokwaneleyo, kwanobomi bonke. Yaye uninzi zonke abantwana ubunzima kulo, ukuba ixesha ayitshintshi le meko.

ke ubomi kwintsapho kukuba iveza iguqula njani umntwana

Abantwana ukusuka kokusingqongileyo etshabalalisayo bafumana umothuko psychological ezinokuthi kwenzeka ngohlobo iingxaki ezininzi kwixesha elizayo. Le ukungazithembi, ukuphazamiseka bangonwabi, kuxhomekeke zonke iintlobo ubunzima kunye trust kunye ukuziqhelanisa kwezentlalo, ukungakwazi ukwakha ubuhlobo obusenyongweni kunye nabahlobo bakho kunye besini esahlukileyo. Uluhlu eqhubekile.

Abantwana kwiintsapho ezikwimeko bafunde ukuze sisinde ngoncedo indlela yokuzikhusela engqondweni. Zakha ngeenxa ngokwabo inkohliso of uthando kunye nothando, yengxoxo kunye ukunciphisa ezi mvakalelo. Ingqumbo nentiyo badla lichaphazele izifundo, abahlobo kunye nabantu ababathandayo. Iimvakalelo alelwe kunye nodaka, kangangokuba umntu abe akanandaba yonke into.

indawo etshabalalisayo ufundisa umntwana angamqhatha na, ukuze aligwebe, ukuba kuziswe kwayo ngokugqithiseleyo, ukuba abe ngumveleli, onoxanduva kakhulu, okanye, icala, zingakhathaliyo. Kuba abantu abanjalo, naluphi na utshintsho buhlungu, ingakumbi kolawulo lwabo. Wayekhangela inkxaso kunye nokwamkelwa, kodwa akanako ukwamkela indumiso. Abantwana abasuka kumakhaya ahlelelekileyo abakwazi bayiqonde ngokwabo, ukuba ukunandipha ubomi kunye bachithe ixesha lokuphola lwabo fun. Yenza eselula, kunye ipateni sele kwaziwa, oko kukuthi, ngokungqinelana yokuziphatha yabazali.

Ukusebenza kunye nosapho obuhesheheshe

Iingcali zengqondo kunye nezinye iingcali abasebenza kunye neentsapho ezinjalo sijongene neengxaki. Kaninzi abavumi ukuthetha ngokuphandle malunga ebomini babo, nokuqaphela ezinye izinto baqonda buhlungu. Ezinye izalamane unqandwe utshintsho, ngokuba le icekisa iingcebiso umcebisi kwaye musa ukubandulula ngaphandle. Esi sibini abanalo nofifi malunga yokuziphatha nendima eyiyo entsatsheni, yaye uqeqesho kufuneka iminyaka.

Inyathelo ekusombululeni ingxaki yokuqala - ukuba ingqondo yakhe. Ukuba uyaqonda ukuba okusingqongileyo lakho ikhaya ayikho yonke elungileyo, kwaye ufuna ukuba intsapho eyonwabileyo, ngoko bonke bungalahleki kwesinomhlwa. Zange kube kade, into engundoqo - ukuze uqale.