Bendzhamin Spok: ubomi, uthando yobomi, umbhali we "Lo mntwana umvelelayo"

Bendzhamin Spok - a wabantwana ezaziwayo-kakuhle, owabhala 1946 kwincwadi ephawulekayo "Umntwana kunye nokhathalelo ngaye." Ngenxa yoko, kuye kube ethengwa. Bambalwa abantu bazi malunga Benjamin Spock, kwincwadi engobomi bakhe kunye nobomi bakhe. Kweli nqaku uza kufunda zonke iinkcukacha malunga ugqirha odumileyo.

Bendzhamin Spok: A Biography (short)

E New Haven, unyana ka igqwetha owaziwayo ezibethwe Spock waba nabantwana abathandathu. I omdala kubo wazalwa Meyi 2, 1903. Yaba Bendzhamin Spok, ngubani kwafuneka ukunceda umama wakhe noMildred Louise ukuthatha unonophelo yabazalwana noodade abaselula. Ngoko ke, ukuba usetyenziswa esemncinane ukukhulisa abantwana ze anyamekele kubo.

Emva kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo, Spock waya Yale University, apho wayefunda khona olunzulu ngolwimi IsiNgesi noncwadi. Wasithanda ukufunda okuninzi yaye wenza rhoqo kwimfundo-self. Plus, waba nokuma entle, waza waqala ukufumana inxaxheba kwezemidlalo. BakaBhenjamin nokuba ngo-1924 eyenziwa kwi-Olimpiki ekuqhubeni eFransi iphumelele imbasa yegolide. Ekugqibeleni yaba intshatsheli-Olimpiki, hayi uvuyo nje nentsapho impumelelo yabo.

Nangona Spock wayezazi kakuhle kulwimi noncwadi, kodwa ndandifuna ukuba gqirha. Wajika. E Yale, waya kwisikolo zonyango ngo-1929 waza waba ngugqirha abo basandula kuqalisa. Akukho namnye kurhanelwa ukuba kwixesha elizayo uya kwaziwa kwagqirha nje kuphela, kodwa abe ngumbhali. Oko enjalo Bendzhamin Spok. Ibali lobomi bakhe elide, kodwa siya bachukumise phezu zinto ezibalulekileyo ebomini bakhe.

ebuntwaneni

Mama Benjamin Spock wabukela ngenyameko abantwana ndabondla kanye njengoko uyalelwe ngugqirha usapho. Wayengayi ukuvumela abantwana babo kwiminyaka elithozamisayo-5. Oku kwakukholelwa ukuba izibuko kuphela amazinyo, kodwa ke amalungu angaphakathi wosana.

usapho Spock yonke abantwana zalala esitratweni, phantsi isigubungelo, kungakhathaliseki ukuba imozulu. Ugqirha wathi kulo abantwana babe besempilweni, bomelele, babe nempilo entle. NoMildred Louise akavumelekanga ukuba ukudlala nabantwana ekuhlaleni. Wayefuna ukuba ndimncede zijikeleze indlu.

Bendzhamin Spok wakhumbula ebuntwaneni bakhe uzisole ethile. Ngapha koko, endaweni nexesha elimnandi kunye noontanga babo, ukuba ukukhwela iyaguquguquka roller, kwaye ndigila nasezitratweni, kwakufuneka ukutshintsha ukucupha, ukulungiselela abaninawa noodade, iibhotile, pacifiers, ukuze uyipheke. D.

Bonke abantwana abathandathu abasoyika uyise, ukuba wayesoloko wamxelela inyaniso icebo lonke. Kodwa umama wam ukoyika kakhulu kwaye rhoqo waxoka ukuba, ngenxa yokuba ukuba isiphoso encinane ukuze abohlwaye. Emva kolo qeqesho, uBhenjamin wamoyika kuphela nabazali, kodwa ootitshala, amagosa amapolisa kunye nezilwanyana. Ugqirha ukhumbula elizayo, wabuza moralist kunye unqalintloko osuka. Bonke ubomi bakhe wayesilwa umsindo wakhe.

Spock wathetha unina ngoloyiko ifudumale ngexesha elifanayo. Wathi ukuba umzali wakhe owayesoloko esazi oko okuhle abantwana bakhe, kwaye ukumphikisa akukho mntu uvumelekileyo. Xa uBenjamin waba kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo, unina zizaku nikezelwa kudweliso leenkedama. Yena wayethanda ukuba abantwana kukho balele emoyeni evulekileyo kuzo zonke weathers.

impilo Personal

Nangona Spock wafunda kwi-Faculty of Medicine, yaba sisiganeko esibalulekileyo kakhulu ebomini bakhe. Ugqirha elizayo nazo ekhaya umtshakazi. abazali owokuqala wazeka intombi elungileyo. Noko ke, xa kwaBhenjamin kunye nomyeni zavalwa kwelo gumbi, umama wazama kukuveza isifo sentliziyo. Kodwa lo mfo kunye intombazana nethamsanqa kakhulu ukuba indlu utata zikhuselwe ukuba nomsindo. Ngaphezu koko, i Pope wabalaselisa usapho umfundi $ 1,000 ngonyaka. ubomi Personal Benjamin Spock sazivelela yimpumelelo kakhulu ngakumbi xa watshata. Wayengenako saba bathobele abazali babo, ukuze ube ngumntu ozimeleyo.

NoMildred Louise ityala elikhulu ngokuphindezela kubo unyana wakhe, ukuba wagqiba kwelokuba makangendeli icebiso lakhe. Ngoko wagqiba ukufumana ukuba yintoni usapho entombini yayo. Ndafumanisa ukuba uyise wabulawa negcushuwa. Kodwa nonyana, nasemva kokuba iingxelo ezinjalo abakhange inxenye kunye nonina.

Lo mzuzu xa uBhenjamin kunye nomfazi wakhe bafunda ukuba alindele usana. Noko ke, usana wafa, kwaye unina akanakuhlala cwaka, waza wavakalisa imbono yakhe. Wathi ukuba ulwalamano lwabo zesini kukhokelela nemiphumela emibi ngenxa uyise womfazi uBhenjamin, ngubani yiNTSHOLONGWANE negcushuwa.

Emva mazwi, uBhenjamin kunye nomfazi wakhe wayeka ukunxibelelana kunye nonina waza waya eNew York, apho waqalisa umkhuba sokuqala wezifo.

BakaBhenjamin nentsapho yakhe

Enyanisweni, lo mfana ushiye umothuko engqondweni ukususela ebuntwaneni. Kungenxa yoko le nto ebomini abadala kuye unzima kakhulu kwaye ngenkohlakalo abantwana babo. Waye enoonyana ababini, naye, zingqondweni ngothando, kodwa akaba nako ukubonisa uthando lwakhe. Kakhulu uyise olungqongqo Bendzhamin Spok. Sons ngokufuthi wakuphepha inkampani yakhe.

Ngandlel 'ithile Spock wavuma ukuba oonondaba ukuba akazange wamanga abantwana babo. Wayeqinisekile ukuba indima ebalulekileyo edlalwa oomama yemfuza. Lo mfana akakwazanga ukumelana naye, noonyana bakhe bahlupheka kakhulu.

Kangangethuba elide usapho babehlala ngokuzolileyo yaye ngokuthe ngcembe. Noko ke, lifikile ixesha xa Spock waba ugqirha odumileyo kakhulu. Ngenxa yoko, umfazi wakhe Waba nobukhwele udumo lwakhe nempumelelo, yaye ngokuthe ngcembe waqalisa ukuba ube inxila isono. Yaye ngowe-1976, intsapho ekugqibeleni apheliswe. Ugqirha ke iminyaka 73 ubudala, kodwa wagqiba kwelokuba batshate kwakhona.

kwakusele kudlule iminyaka engaphezu emva komtshato, Spock kwakhona engqongwe. Yintoni eyona umdla, kunye nomfazi wakhe, ebeminyaka 40 omncinane, kodwa wayemthanda indoda endala. Nangona abanye bemi iminyaka engaphezu udumo, kunokuba indoda yakhe. Njengoko kuvela, bayahlelwa bakaBhenjamin Spock zange sibe lula. Ngapha koko, kwafuneka ukuba silwe ubomi bakhe bonke ngesimilo sakhe ezinzima ezinzima.

Benjamin and Sons

Abantwana bekhubeka gqitha uyise, ngoko akazange afune ukuthetha naye, yaye akazange afune ukuba sisondele kubo. Naso isizathu sokuba wonke phezu kwababuthiweyo bakhe. unyana omncinane ngokuba uYohane, waba ngokomakhi odumileyo. Senior Michael uye wafumana ubizo lwakhe amayeza, kwaye kwenzeka ukuba walandela ekhondweni likayise - waba ngugqirha.

Ngomhla bayahlelwa oonyana babo Spock wayengazi nto. Akazange nokuba utshatile kuzo, njengoko kufunwa yi-amasiko. Ngapha koko, nyana akukho namnye yaye angamxoleli isimo ngenkohlakalo kayise. Noko ke, loo nto ngoko kwenzeka ukuba Spock waqala ukunxibelelana nonyana wakhe Michael, owayebizwa ngokuba uPetros. Kuyo wafumana yokuveza waza wabanika uthando lwabo ezingasetyenziswanga nomzukulwana kuphela.

Ngowe-1983, ngomhla koSuku lweKresimesi (25 Disemba), uPetros wazibulala. Yena isongiwe ne eliseluphahleni myuziyam. A ixesha elide ayikwazanga ukufumana unobangela amanyathelo uPetros. Ngenxa yoko, kuye kwafunyaniswa ukuba nyaka-22 ubudala yayibaleka ntshikilelo lowukulu, leyo akwazi ukumelana. Emva kwesi siganeko, uBhenjamin wahlaselwa yintliziyo, leyo wayigqiba wahlaselwa yintliziyo yokuqala uze istroke. Loko unyana kaMikayeli wayezama ukwenza uxolo kunye noyise, kodwa wasola umzukulwana wakhe uxinezeleko.

Kutheni Spock waba wabantwana

Eneneni, ekuqaleni uBhenjamin waphupha malunga elwandle kwaye wayefuna ukuba ngugqirha kwi enqanaweni. Noko ke, ebutsheni bakhe ugqirha elizayo ukufunda okuninzi malunga psychoanalyst uSigmund Freud, ngubani zibe nempembelelo ebalulekileyo kwezonyango. Ke Spock waqonda ukuba izifo ezininzi ubuntwana musa ukuza ngokwabo. Ubukhulu becala kuxhomekeke kwimfundo kunye nendlela yokuphila. Emva koko wagqiba kwelokuba abe wabantwana.

Xa oselula uGqr Bendzhamin Spok waqala ukuthatha abantwana, yena ngocoselelo wambuza abazali njengoko bekhulisa abantwana. Ekugqibeleni, wenza isigqibo sakhe. Kubonakala ukuba kufuneka bafundise ingakumbi abazali, hayi abantwana. Xa umama notata baya kufunda ukuba baziphathe ngayo, aze ke abe nako ukunxibelelana abantwana.

Yintoni Spock wafundisa abazali

An sezifo zokufuna lowu umntwana - ubuntu. Yinto kakubi, ingakumbi esidlangalaleni. Ugqirha ukufundisa abazali iziseko zemfundo, wabuza ngamandla ukuba ukunyanzela umntwana ukunceda zijikeleze indlu. Ngapha koko, ndiye ndabona le kuhlukunyezwa.

Nangona abazali abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba abantwana kufuneka babe esemncinane ukulungiselela ubomi esibi omdala. Spock babezama ukweyisela kubo ukuba baye abantwana babo ubuntwana aza awasukela ishedyuli yomkhosi. Eneneni, abaninzi abondliwayo ngexesha, zonke iintlobo obukhoyo zizakuqalwa ngayo ngokusebenzisa isohlwayo. Le nto yenziwe ngulo mntwana esemncinane engena ngokwakhe, nguye psyche ukuphazamiseka.

Kuyabonakala ukuba, ngenxa yokuba Spock wayezama ukufundisa abazali, izigulane bakhe baba ngaphantsi. Nangona iintatheli lonke ixesha ngayo wabhala. Ngenxa yoko, ugqirha oselula wagqiba ukubhala incwadi yakhe yokuqala encinane malunga nemiba zengqondo wezifo.

inkqubo yemfundo

Ekubeni ugqirha umnakekeli uthando lukamama, kwaye uphethwe ukuba angabi nako ukunika uthando oonyana bakhe, wabhala incwadi emangalisayo ebizwa ngokuba "Umntwana kunye nokhathalelo ngaye." inkqubo yemfundo Benjamin Spock lusekelwe kuthando lwabazali, yaye ngaphezulu - phezu motherboard.

Ugqirha ngelithi ukuba ukuziphatha umntwana uxhomekeke ngokupheleleyo kwi abadala. Ukuba uthe wazala yakhe ngonaphakade kohlwaywa ityala incinane, kwixesha elizayo umntwana uba umntu mpilweni ngokwasengqondweni. Ngenxa yoko, kukho ukudakumba, ukuzibulala kunye nangaphezulu.

Sezifo ikhuthaza abazali ukuba bathande abantwana babo, nabo bonke ukuxolela. Ngapha koko, akukho namnye ingxaki angafanele iinyembezi zabantwana. Womnqatha ze intonga - oku inkqubo efanelekileyo yezemfundo entsatsheni. Hlala njalo ingqalelo enkulu abantwana babo, baze bona elizayo kukubuyekeza na uhlobo.

Bendzhamin Spok: Book

Uhlelo lokuqala ugqirha ebizwa ngokuba "imiba yezengqondo yokusebenza abantwana." Apho waxelela abazali bakhe ngale psychoanalyst Freud, besithi iimfundiso zakhe abazali kufuneka bazi ukuze kufundiswe eyiyo ukukhulisa abantwana babo.

Spock kwakhona wapapasha incwadi "Incoko kunye nonina." Kuyo, ufundisa abazali ukunxibelelana umntwana, ukuba esweni impilo, ngumsindo. Kwincwadi efanayo ezibhalwe kids zononophelo ase.

Incwadi ethi "Umntwana kunye nemfundo yakhe," iintetho malunga iikherothi kunye neentonga. Ngapha koko, abazali abaninzi ngokungachanekanga ukunyanga imvuthuluka zabo. Kungenxa yoko le nto iya kuba luncedo ukuyifunda nje umama kunye notata.

Kwincwadi nganye, uGqirha ugxininisa akhuliswe ngenyameko nononophelo abantwana. Musa ukulibala ukuba ukususela ebuntwaneni wadlula esikolweni yaye bafunde ukuqonda abantwana ukususela besebancinane kakhulu.

Enye incwadi emangalisayo ebhalwe Bendzhamin Spok - "Umntwana kunye nokhathalelo ngaye." Kokuba lukhutshwe iinxalenye ezimbini, waba ethengwa. Le ncwadi kule mini kulo lonke ihlabathi. It has a lot of amazwi umdla icebiso lobulumko icebisa UGqr Bendzhamin Spok. "Lo mntwana anyamekele yena" - incwadi ifundisa abazali ilungelo nje ukufundisa abantwana kuphela, kodwa ukondla kubo, ukuba nomsindo, ukonwabisa, basebenzisane, njalo-njalo ..

Uhlelo lokuqala nto wakhululwa ngo-1946. Kuthathela umgca ukuba akukho bani owaziyo umntwana bhetele kunabazali bakhe. Ugqirha ebizwa kuphela tshemba wena intuition lakho, kodwa ukuba ukubaleka koogqirha.

Ukuphonononga logqirha neencwadi zakhe

omama abaninzi bafumanisa ukuba Bendzhamin Spok - ugqirha ogqibeleleyo, ngubani kuvula amehlo abazali yezinto ezininzi kangako. Ngokomzekelo, bambalwa abantu bazi ukuba umntwana kondliwa ngobisi lukanina iminyaka emithathu. Ngapha koko, namhlanje oogqirha bathi okwahlukileyo, kwaye abazali abaninzi bakholelwa kuyo.

Nangona kukho ezinye omama bakholelwa ukuba iincwadi zenkulungwane lokugqibela, eziphelelwe lixesha, kodwa musa ukunikela ingqalelo. Noko ke, ukuba ukungena nzulu, ngoxa utsha umbuzo wokuba kutheni abantwana ezisetyenziswa buhlungu. Abaninzi baya kuthi ukuba okusingqongileyo yenye, kodwa asimele silibale ukuba ngaxa lithile yaba ukutya eyahlukileyo, akoyiki umsindo abantwana hayi lavaka phezu kwazo njengoko kunjalo namhlanje. Kwaye yiloo lembandezelo. kuba nje abazali enye, kwaye ukusukela koku kwaye yonke enye into eye yatshintsha. Ngoko uthi Spock.

Njani yaye nini wafa, Bhenjamin

Smer kwenzeka ugqirha akukho wahlaselwa yintliziyo okanye sistroke. Waba wagula ngumhlaza kwaye kwakufuneka unyango olubiza kakhulu. Ke uMikayeli, unyana omdala, waphinda waya kuyise waza wanikela uncedo lwakhe. Noko ke, njengoko kulindelekile, Spock wala unyana imali. Wathi ukuba kulunge ngakumbi ukufa kunokuba yamkele uncedo obangela.

Bendzhamin Spok wafa, akukho bani owaziyo. ukufa kwakhe ngo-1998, ngo March 15. Ngelo xesha wayeneminyaka engama-94 ubudala. Abanye bakholelwa ukuba wafa yokwaluphala, abanye besithi oko ashaye umhlaza. Umfazi akazange avumele ukuba enze yotyando. Ndandifuna ukuba ukukhumbula ukuba indlela. Kuyabonakala ukuba, ngokwenene uthando phakathi kwabo.

isiphelo

Isimanga, kodwa ugqirha ubhale iincwadi ezininzi ezilungileyo ukunceda abazali bakhulisa abantwana babo. Noko ke, Spock ngokwakhe engazange bafunda ukuthanda, imbeko baneqhayiya ngabantwana babo. Kuphela xa kusingethwe nomzukulwana wakhe kunye nabanye abantwana, bakaBhenjamin waqonda iintsilelo zabo, kodwa akaba nako ukwenza nto, kuba ixesha sele ilahlekile.

Funda incwadi ugqirha odumileyo, yaye uya kunifundisa ukuba uzive abantwana bakho nangakumbi. Thanda abantwana bakho, nikelani ingqalelo kubo, kwaye bona kukubuyekeza na uhlobo.